Now for Sami’s ramblings about Jesus:



Sometimes you just have to believe that it works, even if you aren’t feeling anything at the moment. I’m talking about faith, having a relationship with the Lord, trusting that Jesus really is there. There is this wonderful story of how the good news of Jesus Christ was brought to non-Jews for the first time after Jesus’ resurrection. A roman military commander, head of a hundred soldiers (called a centurion), was praying one day to God. He was a man who feared God, prayed continuously, and gave money to people in need regularly. His name was Cornelius. On this particular day, an angel appeared to him and said, “Your prayers and your alms have ascended as a memorial before God” (Acts 10:4). It’s not like this happened everyday, because Cornelius was terrified. As it happened, the angel told Cornelius to send for Peter, the apostle. Once Peter spoke the gospel to him, Cornelius and all his family and friends received the gift of the Holy Spirit and were baptized that day.



What so comforts me about this story is that it tells us where our prayers go—straight to the ears of God. In fact, God saves them as precious treasures. When I picked up Noah for his last day of day care before the Christmas break, his teacher had made an ornament for our tree by tracing Noah’s hand prints and foot print onto brown construction paper to make a moose head. Now I have lots of ornaments, some very fragile and pretty expensive. But none can compare to my construction paper moose. To me it is a precious treasure. This is how every word and thought of prayer and heartfelt good deed we do is to our Heavenly Father. God saves them up like construction paper mooses.



It’s hard to always know these things. It’s why we need scripture, and the encouragement of good Christian friends. And it is also why God said that “faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen” (Hebrews 11:1). We know our prayers are precious to God by faith. In some ways it is like Christmas decorations. Even though I don’t have my Christmas ornaments out year round, they still exist. Even though I don’t see my little moose everyday, I know it is there. Even though we cannot always feel God’s presence, or feel how much He loves us, His presence and His love are very real.



So come on back to school. Start the semester off right: knowing you are loved, your prayers are heard, and your life really does make a difference.



Blessings,



Sami

And now for Sami’s ramblings about Jesus:



I’ve been thinking about family and what that word means a lot lately. On Sunday morning a couple told the story of how God moved them to adopt a 4 year old little boy from another country. It was so moving to hear how an independent and happily childless couple began the journey to adopt someone of a completely different language and culture into their lives. As they spoke of Brian, their son, it was evident that God had expanded their hearts so much to accommodate his presence; the love they felt for that little boy spilled out of their voices and onto ever ear that heard their story. It reminded me of Bill and Kim, my own brother and sister-n-law who have adopted their own baby boy from Russia. Konnor officially entered our family on the day that Noah was born. Soon, he would enter our hearts as well, just as he had already become deeply woven into the hearts of Bill and Kim. It has made me realize how powerful family ties are, and how family is born of love, not simply born.



Certainly the word “family” echoes more deeply in my own heart this Christmas season. As I look at the “Baby’s First Christmas” ornament hanging on our tree, I marvel that just one year ago our hearts were filled with the painful ache and longing to have a child of our own. And now Noah announces his presence in our lives in the most amazing ways: with coos, and laughs, and cries, and lots of dirty diapers! I am constantly surprised at how easily I miss him when we are apart. Last Friday night, as we made our annual Wesley Foundation road trip to Nashville to see the lights, I kept looking into the eyes of passing children wishing Noah could be there with us, dreaming of that day when he will be old enough to enjoy all the decorations of the Opryland Hotel. And while I walked around that winter wonderland, I was poignantly aware that this longing to see my son had to be like God’s longing to see us. I could feel a new awareness of the miracle of Christmas dawning in my heart; because Jesus lives there, that constant communion with my Heavenly Father is always there. God sent Jesus because He wanted to be close to us all the time. I knew being a mother would change me. I just never could imagine the power of that love. While it is the most urgent and powerful feeling I have ever had, it pales greatly in comparison to God’s love for us. His love is unlegislated. Which is to say that it simply comes to us and keeps on coming.



I know this is true because I feel His love move through me for each person He has placed in my care as a pastor. And as I enter into God’s love for you, I am deeply changed. I will jokingly say sometimes that before I had Noah, I had the students at the Wesley Foundation. But in a very real way it is true. The love of Christ that dwells in my heart for this ministry and for each of you is purely unlegislated. We are not related by blood, but the bonds certainly are as lasting. We belong to each other. Because of this calling on my life, I belong to you. It breaks my heart that anyone could live their entire lives without knowing this kind of love. It breaks my heart that there are those on this campus who don’t know this kind of belonging.



If I could give anything in the world to people I cared about, I would give them the experience of the Wesley Foundation. What this place did for me years ago as a student, it is still doing. It is a place where the love of Jesus Christ becomes real in the most amazing, funny, and meaningful ways. Nothing else tops it. Especially for those who really need to belong. We belong to each other in the miracle of becoming Christ’s body. We are family.



Christmas is really an adoption story. It is the story of a loving Father who reaches out to His estranged children through His Beloved Son. It is the story of an eternal adoption, by which those who were far away from the Father’s love are brought near by a tiny baby boy who would one day lay down His life for us. It is the story of that glorious reunion of our hearts rejoicing in the love of our doting Father, who gives us His all so that we can have all He is.



This is the miracle I experience everyday at the Wesley Foundation. Come experience it with me.



Blessings,



Sami

Now for Sami’s ramblings about Jesus:



I just put up pictures on my walls. On my message board is a card that says Enjoy the Journey. Underneath the caption is this quote: “Happiness is not a destination. It is a method of life.” As a friend of mine from seminary would say, “That’ll preach!” So many people are so miserable. It’s like they live their lives thinking, “if I could only have . . . .” And then they get that golden egg, just to discover some other void or obstacle that keeps them from being satisfied. I love the wisdom that Paul shares towards the end of his life: “ . . . . I have learned to be content with whatever I have. I know what it is to have little, and I know what it is to have plenty. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being well-fed and of going hungry, of having plenty and of being in need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me” (Phillipians 4:11-13).



Not exactly a scripture we hear a lot at Christmas time, but it is so appropriate and so needed. As a child I rated Christmas on how good the gifts were. And even the old clay-mation specials seemed to equate happiness with getting toys. But what is beyond the stuff? I mean, stuff breaks; it gets lost or misplaced; stuff eventually gets old and boring. The “if I could only have” mentality is only a cruel illusion. We are all searching for that something to fill us up. This is natural. But that longing we feel was put their by our Maker. It is a longing to know and be known by Him. This is what Christmas is all about. God gives Himself to us in a way we can understand. The God of the universe, who cannot be seen by human eyes, came to us as a human child, living in the world we live in, growing as we grow, struggling as we struggle, knowing intimately what it is to be frail and human. This is Jesus, the only one who fills up that ache that keeps us up at night. Know Him, love Him. He already knows and loves you. And when you receive the One who offers Himself to you in all His fullness this Christmas season, you will never again say, “if only I could.” You will know happiness, not as a fleeting feeling, but as the true joy that is a method of life, a gift that never leaves, that never breaks, that never gets lost or misplaced, that never gets old and boring. You will have discovered the true meaning of Christmas.



This is my prayer for you. You are all the best gifts. I praise God for the opportunity to know you and serve you.



Blessings,



Sami

Now for Sami’s ramblings about Jesus:



I was standing in line at Sears today waiting to purchase some things, when I overheard others in line complaining about Christmas because of the lines. Of course I had Noah with me, and he began to need some attention. As I knelt down to find his pacifier (hoping to postpone all out wails for a couple of minutes), I overheard the gentleman behind me say, “Now that’s what Christmas is all about.” Isn’t though?



Christmas is all about a baby boy, and a new mother, crazy crowds, and crowded inns. Over the summer I spent time musing about what it must have been like for Mary as I walked uphill during my last weeks of pregnancy. I imagined her discomfort riding a donkey (the car was bad enough for me once I had been there more than half an hour). And I can almost hear the sound of her voice saying, “You want me to have this baby where!?” After 2000 years worth of idealizing it, our nativity scenes have become somewhat sanitized. We quietly sing, “All is calm; all is bright.” Try telling that to a woman who just found out her delivery attendants can only moo, bahh, or bray.



So Christmas is chaotic. The truth is that it always has been. Jesus’ birth was not idyllic. It was real. He came here real, covered with blood, peach fuzz, and vernix. The clean, smiling six month old we see gently cooing in the hay on our mantles is a bit overdone. However, there is some good theology in the real life drama of Jesus’ birth. The good news is we don’t have to clean up and sanitize our lives before we invite Him in. The best Christmas gift did not arrive on this earth neatly wrapped in a ribbon. He probably was red-faced, squirmy, fussy, and could really use that set of lungs His heavenly Father equipped him with.



I’m so glad that Jesus is right at home in the midst of crazy, chaotic moments. There are so many of them that we would never survive if His blessed presence wasn’t in them. I am so glad that somehow Jesus makes His home in the realness of our lives, but then begins making real the peace of His presence. I am so glad that inviting Jesus into our hearts has a way of settling down those things within and without, so that we are transformed by His calm love, becoming catalysts of transforming love wherever we happen to be. Oh He is so great and awesome! I am amazed at His incarnation, that He wanted to join the human race and that He still wants to join us where we are.



We can feel guilty about the chaos in our lives, guilty that there is more of the season than there is of us to go around, guilty that once more time slips away and we failed to experience that picture in our head or the scene on our mantle. Or we can stop right this moment and pray, “Even so Lord Jesus, quickly come.” This is my Christmas prayer. There is not enough of me to make life something other than it is. Sometimes I just have to shrug my shoulders in apology, and invite Jesus into, not just the good, but also the bad and the ugly.



Funny thing. He’s always happy to enter in.



Blessings,



Sami

Now for Sami’s ramblings about Jesus:



In my office I have this ceramic angel lamp that is made in such a way that she is always looking upon you, no matter where you are in the room. It kind of reminds me of the Amy Grant song that came out while I was in Jr. High “Angels Watching Over Me.” Amy would fervently sing, “Got His angels watching over me, every move I make. Angels watching over me. Angels watching over me, every step I take. Angels watching over me.” The only verse I can remember goes something like this: “God only knows the times my life’s been threatened just today. A reckless car ran out of gas before it ran my. Near misses all around me; accidents unknown. Though I’ll never see with human eyes the hands that lead me home. But I know they’re all around me, all day and through the night. When the enemy is closing in, and I know sometimes they fight. To keep my feet from falling, I’ll never turn away. If you ask me who’s protecting me, then you’re gonna hear me say. . . .”



This morning I was reading in Acts about Paul’s trip to Rome. He was a prisoner being taken to see the emperor. The ship he was sailing on encountered heavy storms that threatened to kill them all. And yet in the midst of the turmoil, Paul continues to pray and seek the face of God. One day he says to everyone on board with him, “I urge you now to keep up your courage, for there will be no loss of life among you, but only of the ship. For last night there stood by me an angel of the God to whom I belong and whom I worship, and he said, ‘Do not be afraid, Paul; you must stand before the emperor; and indeed, God has granted safety to all those who are sailing with you.’ So keep up your courage, men, for I have faith in God that it will be exactly as I have been told” (Acts 27:22-25).



Looking back over the past year, I see so many reasons to keep up my courage. There have been so many people who have been angels in my life. I think of chance encounters with people of faith who had just the right word of hope I needed to hear. I think of the perfect timing of events where things just fell into place with a precision that had God’s fingerprints all over it. I think of those unanswered prayers that, had they been answered, would have been disastrous. God’s help for our circumstances is always close at hand. One of the angels in my life I am especially thankful for right now is Becky, our intern. For those of you who don’t know her, she really is worth getting to know well. The timing of her becoming a part of our ministry here at the foundation is such a blessing. I know that once again God’s hand is at work.



It is so easy to be in the midst of a storm, with the ship breaking up all around, and forget that God’s providence and provision are close beside us. We look at our losses and feel devastated. We forget those miracles that bring us safely to shore so that our lives may be restored. Sometimes it is helpful to simply recall all the ways God’s grace has saved the day in our lives. From the very beginning, remembering God’s goodness throughout the past puts a new perspective on our present and our future. Like Amy Grant says, we rarely see with human eyes the hands that lead us home. We only recognize the grace of God’s help by its results.



As you travel this coming week, as you eat turkey and dressing, as you share the love of family and friends, remember that God’s grace is with you. As invisible as air, and yet sustaining you just as much as your next breath. God loves you. God hears your prayers. God sends His mighty help.



Thank you for sharing this journey with me.



Blessings,



Sami

Joy Fest

There is this really great episode of “Friends” where Phoebe and Rachel go running in Central Park. Rachel runs like everybody else, but Phoebe has a special way of running. She just lets loose and throws her arms and legs everywhere while she runs as fast as she can, the way she did when she was a little girl. Phoebe simply explains that if she is going to have to run she is going to have fun doing it. After being very judgmental about Phoebe’s “form,” eventually Rachel gives in to that childlike delight in running at breakneck speed with arms and legs flailing in the wind.

How about you? When was the last time you gave in to the simple delight of being alive? I love going shopping for the Wesley Foundation with Becky, our campus missionary intern, and whoever else happens to be there. It is always an adventure. And something about the delight of being out of the office and in a place with lots of cool stuff sets in. I’m worse than a kid in a candy store. Funny, it’s not as fun shopping by myself. There is no one to share the joy with. No one to show all the cool stuff to. No one to be a witness to the silliness that is part of my childlike delight.

I believe that Jesus was, is, full of delight. I believe that He takes great pleasure in the simple things of life. I believe that He regularly laughed out loud on earth, and I believe that He regularly laughs out loud in Heaven. We have heard the scripture that says, “The joy of the Lord is my strength.” But how seriously do we take that Word of the Lord? Maybe this is why so many Christians are so “not strong.” It seems we have gotten so serious about belonging to God that we have left the parts of God that aren’t “serious” out. Those are important parts! The JOY of the Lord is my strength. Not the discipline of the Lord, not the rules of the Lord, not the determination of the Lord, not the power of the Lord, not the wisdom of the Lord, but the JOY OF THE LORD.

My prayer for you is that you experience the Lord’s joy. It is a precious, precious thing. It “takes a lickin’, but keeps on tickin’.” God’s joy cannot be taken away. It is the gift of His presence which is with us always. Only we can squelch it. Only we can put it out of our lives and pretend it is not there. So many Christians live a miserable existence, but this is not, and never has been, the Lord’s intention for any of us. So do something harmless and crazy and fun. Fill your life with delight. Let the Lord show you how to really laugh again. Allow Jesus to give you His strength.

Blessings,

Sami

Now for Sami’s ramblings about Jesus:



I hope everyone had a fun and safe Halloween. The Halloween party we had last Thursday was so much fun. Once again Jason wins best costume. You should ask to see the pictures. He makes a good Jesus. I can’t help it. I love Halloween. Ever since I was a kid I have loved dressing up in a costume and going from house to house to get candy. I loved singing the songs of the season: “Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat!” Even though I don’t go trick or treating now, I love to be the first one to answer the door when the goblins, ghosts, and ladybugs come by. (Yes, we had an adorable lady bug stop by.) I so enjoy the fun of seeing kids all dressed up and the joy of giving away treats that make them smile. Lord knows I can’t wait till Noah is big enough to go around the neighborhood.



I think the fascination for me has always been the opportunity to pretend to be something or someone else, to exercise my imagination in creating a fabulous new identity. It was always so much fun to dress up. One of the things I have learned over time is that many of us expend a lot of energy playing “dress up” everyday. I know I have. It’s not that we put on costumes before going to class or work, but we do make sure we project an image of ourselves that we want others to find attractive and believable, or at least an image that is acceptable to ourselves. I used to do this with a smile. My motto was, “always be nice, never be mad, and always look happy.” People would comment on how I was the happiest person they knew. In reality, the smile I wore often hid my real feelings. It was easier to put on a smile than to admit to myself and others that I didn’t have it all together. That’s just an example. People hide all kinds of things about themselves for all kinds of reasons.



I think of Mr. Rogers. When I was in seminary I would come home everyday from class and watch his show “Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood.” I think it was therapy for me. I was finally having the mask of happiness peeled away and was very uncomfortable with what I was seeing in its place. But everyday I would hear those words from Mr. Rogers, “I like you just the way you are.” I was learning that it was okay to feel sad, mad, and drab. It was okay to need help. And I was also learning that while not everyone is like Mr. Rogers, some people are.



I like to think of the Wesley Foundation as a part of Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood. We’re not fancy, but everyone who comes through our doors is important. It is a place where “Just As I Am” is more than an altar call song, it is the invitation to the family. Come just as you are. Come and share your burdens. Come and share your boredom. Come and share your real self. Because once you don’t have to spend so much energy pretending to be something you are not, you miraculously find the strength to really experience true joy.



By the way, the real Mr. Rogers is Jesus. In His neighborhood, or shall we say Kingdom, everyone is important and highly treasured. Every person’s feelings are respected. And each one of us has the space needed to learn how to be like Him. There are no unreal expectations of us in the Kingdom of God except the ones we bring with us.



I pray that today you will feel the joy of being accepted for who you are. I pray that you will experience the freedom to just be yourself. I pray that you will know you have a home you can come to where you will be liked. If you don’t come to the Wesley Foundation, I pray Jesus will lead you to another place that is also part of “the neighborhood.”



Blessings,



Sami

No Regrets

Every now and then I’ll find something I wrote a while back that really seems to make sense. In one of these random notes to myself I found this on the back of an old bulletin today. “Keeping Sabbath: Doing those things that you would wish you had done if you died tomorrow, nurturing those things that go with us beyond death.” I’m sure this is one of those God things that I just happened to catch as it flew by. It really speaks to me today. It puts into perspective all of those things whirling around inside my heart and mind. Here’s the question: What am I doing right now that is really worth doing? What am I worrying about that is really that important? What in my life right this minute has lasting significance?



Now I know that life demands its share of busy work and things that we would rather not do. But is there some space in our life when we focus on the good stuff? Have you hugged your cat today? Have you called your best friend just to say hi and tell him or her thank you for being there? Have you told your mom and dad that you love them? Have you let the Lord smile on you? It’s a pretty neat thing to just sit there and feel the pleasure of the Lord dwelling upon you. God gets the biggest grin when we will just be still and let Him love on us. When was the last time you let the good stuff have part of your day?



No regrets. That’s what I would give each of you, a life with no regrets. Of course this isn’t in my power, but it is in God’s. So we’ve wasted time. So we’ve given too much attention to non-essential stuff and not enough to the important things. The forgiveness that comes through Jesus Christ wipes that slate clean. He gives even our missteps meaning. And then He shows us how to grab hold of REAL life now. I want to challenge you (and me) to spend some time this weekend keeping Sabbath, doing those things we wish we had done if we were to die unexpectedly, nurturing those things that go with us beyond death.



Jesus loves you so much; and I do too. Keep hanging in there.



Blessings,



Sami

Miracles in the Mundane

It is hard to come up with something profound to say. Two words: sleep deprivation. Sometimes I think my only life consists of making bottles, feeding, burping, changing. When I worked as a pastor in a church I would counsel with women who had children who were trying to get their spiritual lives in order. I would say, “just set aside five minutes a day to read your Bible.” I would still offer the same challenge today, but today I know now how difficult squeezing out even five minutes can be. I guess what I am learning is that there is a lot of holiness in the mundane when we invite the presence of Christ into it. Now I know many of you are not up at night feeding a baby. But many of you are up at night studying for exams, writing papers, completing projects. I know that you probably spend a good hour each day just walking up and down the hill. I know that going to the grocery and looking for a new parking place when you return can be a frustrating but necessary experience.



What mundane things can you invite Jesus into? How can the mundane things in life teach you about a Heavenly Father that is actively involved in every detail of your living? I look into the face of Noah, hoping and praying that he loves me, that he knows me. And then I wonder if God looks into my face wondering the same thing? What about you? When you climb the Hill do you imagine Jesus climbing with you? Do you imagine how Jesus helps you climb the mountains of adversity and challenge? When you ask questions in the classroom do you consider how the Lord welcomes your questions about faith and then helps you to find the answers?



Returning to the Wesley Foundation has helped me connect with that part of life beyond diapers and spit-up, helping me appreciate even more the gift of diapers and spit-up. My prayer for you is that you will find a place of serenity within the ordinary, that Jesus will be real to you every moment: the serious ones, the boring ones, the challenging ones, the funny ones, the tedious ones, the frustrating ones, not just the spiritual ones. Please know how precious you are in His eyes and how thankful I am to be sharing the mundane with you!





Blessings,



Sami

Live and Learn

For those of you who don’t know, Noah Joseph Wilson was born at 8:50am on Friday, August 20th. From the beginning I had a really hard time getting him to eat. Because of this he became very dehydrated. When we went to the doctor his sodium levels were dangerously high, and he had to be admitted to the hospital. Since Greenview didn’t have the staff or facilities to take care of him, he had to be taken to Vanderbuilt Children’s Hospital in Nashville. His first two weeks of life were the most difficult two weeks of my life. It is hard to even put into words what they were like.



When we got to the ICU at Greenview (before being transferred to Vandy) there was a wonderful nurse who put her arm around me and said, “I want you to repeat after me: I will not blame myself; I’m here to take care of Noah; and I’m here to learn.” She would make me repeat these three things to her every time she saw me. As a friend of mine from seminary would say, “That will preach!”



Sometimes in life things happen that are beyond our control. My mom says we each do the best we can at any given moment. And sometimes our best still comes up short. It is so easy to look at the difficulties of our lives and meditate on “what might have been” or “if only . . . “ But looking backward that way just seems to heap more heartache on top of what we already have. I like what the nurse said to me: take care of what you can right now and learn what you can right now.



Maybe you are in the middle of the hardest semester of your life. Maybe you are having relationship problems. Maybe you have regrets. Maybe you’ve made mistakes. Maybe you are at .the hardest point in your entire life, and just need someone to put an arm around you and say it will turnout all right. Maybe God sent the words of that nurse to encourage you too. We cannot change the past, but we can seek the Lord and entrust to Him the present and the future. In the meantime we can take care of what we can now and learn what we can. From my experience I have learned that God is there even when we feel most alone and forsaken. I know that God loves you and is with you right now. Just keep holding on to those words of hope. Soon you will see they really are true.



Blessings.



Sami